5 Toys I Hope Are In Toy Story 3
I haven’t watched Toy Story 3 yet, so I don’t know what all of the little cameo toy appearances are– but here are some of my favorite childhood toys (which may date me as a child born in the mid-’80s) that definitely deserve some Toy Story screen time.
My Little Pony
Woody: A horse! A horse! My kingdom for a horse!
* My Little Pony trots up
Pony: What’s the matter, Woody?
Woody: THANK GOD YOU’RE HERE. Let me get on top of you.
Pony: Uhhhhh…I like you Woody, but how about you just comb my hair for now and we’ll see where things go from there?
Seriously, how have there been no My Little Ponies so far?!
Teddy Ruxpin
The Teddy Ruxpin of our household belonged not to me but to my brother, which suited me fine– the thing is f!%#ing creepy, and even the marketers knew it because they decided to make a Frankenstein-themed ad for a teddy bear designed to tell heartwarming fables to little kids. We should retire Chucky and replace him with Teddy, or better yet, recreate the entire Frankenstein tale starring ol’ Ruxpin. Ruxpinstein, we can call it. It’d be fantastically horrific, just like the toy itself.
Gak
…Okay, fair enough, I’m not entirely sure what form Nickelodeon’s “gak” toy would make, which is exactly what would make it so cool in CG– it’d just be a big oozy blob that spoke, but not with any mouth the viewer could find. And it would make the requisite “Gak sounds” as well, naturally.
Polly Pocket
Ahh, the mighty lure of a tiny, portable toy you could hide from your teacher in a pocket combined with the equally mighty lure of the forbidden: cosmetics! (It’s a compact, remember?) Even I could not resist Polly Pocket, and I love the idea of perhaps a trio of napoleon complex-suffering Polly Pockets, struggling to compensate for their tiny size by being incessantly bitchy. Love it.
My Buddy/Kid Sister
Of course, if you’re going to have a tiny toy you have to have a titan toy to go with it. How about the relatively large My Buddy and Kid Sister? The truly devious side of me wants them to be some kind of dark villains with a mildly incestuous side, but hey, this is Toy Story 3, so let’s just leave it at villains and call it good.
Hey Pixar, if you have any trouble writing Toy Story 4, look me up, okay?
Gia Manry is a professional writer specializing in geek culture. She currently writes primarily for Anime News Network, but also likes being followed on Twitter. She can be contacted via her website.